There’s a little-known reality in the healing and personal development world that, after a client successfully takes a desired action that was previously impossible for them, there will follow a phase of transformation that I call ‘Post Action Anxiety’.

The myth is that the process of change is complete once the new action is taken.

The reality is, after taking a significant action, there will be a period of frustration, fear, overwhelm, self-doubt and perhaps disillusionment. Where we can lose sight of the overall vision and motivation for the change.

 

Another way I speak about this is that ‘every expansion is inevitably followed by a contraction’.  That’s a universal truth for all biological systems. The danger is that without an awareness of this, it’s easy to let those emotions run the show and not only sabotage our forward momentum but sometimes we even end up in a lower energetic vibration than we started!

Todd Henry, in his book, Louder Than Words, talks about this as The Big ‘U’.  We start off at the top of the left-hand side of the U when we take the new action.  But rather than moving in a straight line directly to the next new action at the top of the right hand of the U, first we must navigate the inevitable valley between those peaks.

EFT is very effective at navigating the ‘U’ with grace and acceptance.

Here’s a recent simple example from my own life. For years I’ve been shovelling my driveway throughout the winter.  There are two facts that have made this increasingly challenging over the last few years.

One: It’s a circular driveway and I live on a major highway.  

Two: I am happily spending increasing amounts of the winter season in a warmer climate.

So, when I am home there is two times the heavy end of driveway shovelling to do and when I’m not there – there is a major buildup of snow and ice to deal with when I get home.

Now – I know you’re saying … this is not a difficult issue to solve.  Hire someone. Ah, if only the logical brain was strong enough to surmount the subconscious beliefs that rule our lives.  For me, two beliefs were solidly installed by my Presbyterian Scottish childhood: “If you can do it yourself you have to do it.”  And, “The only way to get it done right is to do it yourself.” Anyone relate?

I did some EFT on the beliefs and they lessened enough for me to take the action of hiring a snowplough contractor in advance of last week’s Toronto area snowstorm.  When the storm hit, I wasn’t home and thoroughly enjoyed the feelings of excitement and freedom at having my driveway shovelled by someone other than me! For about 10 minutes …

Soon, I recognized that I was ‘in the U’.  I was feeling illogically guilty and ashamed and quite uncomfortable. Who did I think I was to have this luxury? I could literally hear my father’s voice in my head shaming me for spending money on something that I could have done myself.  

I tapped through all of those feelings and came to the cognitive shift that “I am entitled to make my own choices about how-to live my life, including how to spend money.”   Those loyalty beliefs are strong, aren’t they?

I encourage you to watch out for the inevitable Big ‘U’ when you or your client are poised to take a significant action that will expand the vibration of their life.  It’s actually a sign of success; if there is no ‘U’, then the action wasn’t likely a significant change.

It’s helpful to pre-frame the concept of the ‘U’ for your client whenever they are close to taking significant action.  Let them know that it is normal and that they can use EFT to:

• Accept the potential of a contraction,
• Clear the intensity of the specific emotional and cognitive aspects that arise during the contraction.
• Use it as an opportunity to discover the limiting beliefs that have been activated.
• Celebrate that they have made a meaningful change!